When Crypto Bros Go Full Apocalypse Mode: The Nauru Island Saga

Remember the FTX collapse? Plot twist just got weirder. Court docs reveal Sam Bankman-Fried’s brother Gabe was seriously shopping for an entire Pacific island nation—specifically Nauru (pop. 12,000)—using FTX customer funds.

The Bunker Plan

Not just any island purchase. Gabe allegedly wanted to drop up to $300 million to build a “doomsday bunker” on Nauru in case of apocalyptic events. The proposal also mentioned establishing “genetic enhancement research labs” there. Bold move: turning a struggling phosphate-mining nation into a crypto billionaire’s survival compound.

Why Nauru?

Small island (easy to control?), declining economy (cheap property?), one of Earth’s most densely populated nations per capita. The math checks out if you’re trying to be unaccountable to nobody.

The Reality Check

• No formal offer was apparently made
• Gabe claims he was just “exploring options to help humanity”
• The funds weren’t even his to spend (customer money seized in bankruptcy)
• Currently buried in FTX’s broader lawsuit against former execs for misappropriating customer assets

The Larger Picture

This isn’t some isolated “lol crypto” moment. It’s Exhibit A in why unregulated custody of billions in crypto assets + zero accountability = countries-for-sale fever dreams. The fact that even considering this seemed possible reveals how broken the guardrails were.

Gabe denies wrongdoing. Lawsuit still ongoing. The audacity? Absolutely off the charts.